Sunday, July 20, 2008

Chareidim and Light Bulbs

In the upcoming (?) Book Two, I have indicated that I plan to write a chapter on the Chareidi approach to Halacha and what the "veldt" considers to be "chumras".

In light of this, here is a segment that I may use as an opening to the chapter. Comments are welcome:

Question: How many chareidim does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer: 14 -

10 chareidim to sit in Kollel and debate all the Halachic issues of changing light bulbs (i.e., do you have to toivel (immerse) the light bulb before you use it; if you studied Torah under the light, can you throw out the old light bulb or does it require genizah; if the light bulb is more than a tefach (hand’s breadth) in diameter and there is a corpse underneath, does it convey the impurity, etc.)

1 chareidi posek to answer all the shailos

2 chareidim to collect money for the light bulb (because of v’hiyisem nkiyim m’hashem u’m’yisrael) and finally ---

1 chareidi to buy the bulb and change it (of course, if he is left handed, he must find out if he can change it with his left hand or if he must still use his right)

but all this is if it is only a bare light bulb. If the light bulb is inside a fixture we will need 15 chareidim ----
-- That's right. We will need 1 more to check the fixture for bugs!!

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