Yesterday was a great day for Klal Yisroel. Most of us do not know that the news media is only
telling us a fraction of the story. I found out from anonymous reliable sources
that this wasn’t stam and that there was a lot that happened within the
previous 24 hours that we weren’t told. I got the full scoop and so here I give
you the actual story of R. Sholom Rubashkin’s miraculous release:
And it was, at the end of eight years of days, and
PharTrump was dreaming and behold he was standing on the Iowa side of the
Mississippi. And behold, from the river arose seven glatt kosher beef cattle of pleasant
appearance and prime on the rib and they grazed in Postville. And behold another
seven treifeh beef cattle arose after them from the river, of poor appearance and short on the rib and they stood next to the first cattle on the bank of the river. And
the treifeh beef cattle that were poor in appearance and thin of flanken devoured the
seven kosher cattle that were pleasant of appearance and hearty, and PharTrump awoke.
And it was in the morning and his spirit was troubled,
and he Twittered and he summoned all his spin doctors and all his wise men and son
in law and he told them over his dream and none could interpret it for PharTrump.
Then his bartender Papadopoulos spoke up
and said, “I must acknowledge my sins today. Before PharTrump blew his top at me, I was hanging around Otisville to check it out in case things went South, me and Steve Bannon. There we
met a Hebrew National from Iowa who was an [acquitted] slave[holder] known as the Chief of the Slaughterers. He said he
was in because Linda R. Reade, the wife of his master PETAfar, Chief [anti] Executioner for Phara-Oh Bama the Last, had it in for him. We asked him
what’s in store for us and he pulled out a book called Igros Kodesh and told
us to stick a paper in any page. We did that and he checked the pages and said
I would get busted and Steve would get canned. And it was as he predicted so it came to be, I
was busted and Steve was hung out to dry.”
And PharTrump sent for and summoned Sholom and they
hurried him out of the slammer. He refused to shave but he changed his clothes
and he came before PharTrump.
זה היום עשה
ה' נגילה ונשמחה בו!
Mazel Tov to Reb Sholom Mordechai Rubashkin, LOY”T and
to all of Klal Yisroel. I am certain that this day of Zos Chanuka will be
forever remembered by the Chabad Chassidim and made into a day of great
gathering and rejoicing because this is what the Chabadniks always do to celebrate
when one of theirs gets out of jail, especially if it’s in Kislev (okay, it was Teves).
I think we can all see the Yad Hashem and understand
that sometimes what looks like a disaster is truly a yeshuah. We were all
shocked and dismayed when we saw the unruly behavior of the court and the
harshness of the charges and the sentence. We were all lamenting that it is way
beyond reason.
But I think this very makka turned out to be the refuah
because if Judge Reade would have been more practical and handed down a 10 or
15 year sentence, perhaps there would be no pressure to review the case and Reb
Sholom would still be there. It is only because the sentence was so harsh and
over the top that so many lawmakers and politicians were up in arms that
facilitated this early release.
מה רבו מעשיך
ה'.
4 comments:
Well done.יישר כחך.
Thank you. I have made a few changes since the initial version. I would be grateful if you included it in your links.
Good Shabbos
Thank you, this was intelligently conceived and quite amusing.
Thanks for the bedtime story
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