The Enigma of the Sigma (Purim 5784)

 

Note – I recommend this related post: Divergence from the Womb

 

 

וְכׇל־עַבְדֵ֨י הַמֶּ֜לֶךְ אֲשֶׁר־בְּשַׁ֣עַר הַמֶּ֗לֶךְ כֹּרְעִ֤ים וּמִֽשְׁתַּחֲוִים֙ לְהָמָ֔ן... וּמׇ֨רְדֳּכַ֔י לֹ֥א יִכְרַ֖ע וְלֹ֥א יִֽשְׁתַּחֲוֶֽה׃

 

I am proud to call myself a DIY (Do-it-Yourself) psychologist. I even gave myself a doctorate from University of Google at Home (UGH). My thesis was on MBTI, Myers-Briggs Typology Indicator. If you are not familiar with MBTI, I urge you to look it up HERE.

I became a fan of MBTI ever since I learned about it in an honest-to-goodness psychology class that I really attended many years back. MBTI goes a long way in explaining what makes people tick and why “these” kinds of people simply cannot behave like “those” kinds of people and why we cannot expect folks who act “this way” or “that way” to ever change. It is often used by relationship counselors and therapists as a tool to help determine where couples share common ground and where and why they cannot connect on other issues and how to deal with these unchangeable conflicts.

I went so far as to write a term paper on MBTI for that class I attended in 2005. This is what I was calling my “thesis” in the opening paragraph of this post. You can see that paper and how I applied MBTI to our Avos HaKedoshim HERE.

It was very easy for me to identify myself as an “INTJ” (Introverted-Intuitive-Thinking-Judging) which makes a lot of sense because INTJs are the ones that go for this kind of thing. INTJs are the ones that need things to make sense. Their decisions are based on rational calculations and not on emotions. Because of this, we INTJs tend to come across as cold, unfeeling, non-compassionate types.

As long as we are not sociopaths, this is the furthest from the truth. We are conservatives and not liberals. We are not prone to indiscriminate or misplaced compassion like liberals or like those who have the F (Feeling) attribute are. We use our compassion sparingly. Since we are low on the F scale, we do not allow ourselves to be governed by our emotions. But we have them as much as anyone else.

Hence, I have been wearing MBTI and my personal INTJ status on my sleeve as a sort of identity card. Yep, I am a member of the “exclusive” INTJ club - for what it’s worth.

Note - There are a total of 16 MBTI combinations and each one can be considered its own “club”. INTJ is known to be among the rarer types. It is presented as the third rarest type overall (2.1%), but it is only the fifth rarest in males (4%). All this is in the worldwide population, but I believe the percentages are much different in the Torah world with a higher percentage of INTJs.

I consider this to be one of a sizable group of privileges. I believe it is a privilege to be Jewish and a privilege to be a male. I make a bracha on these two privileges every morning. It is certainly a privilege to live in Eretz Yisrael and especially in Yerushalayim. There should be a bracha for these as well. It is a privilege to be shomer Torah and mitzvos and a chareidi Jew by my definition. It is a privilege to be a husband, a father and a grandfather. It is a privilege to have good family roots (yichus) and an extended family.

These are the universal ones that almost anyone can agree with. But I have some strange ones. I also believe it is a privilege to be an INTJ and, as weird as this may sound, to be left-handed. I happen to prefer exclusivity (it’s an INTJ trait).

I thought this sums up the exclusive clubs of rare personality types, until I was introduced to…the wolf pack.

In recent years I sometimes saw the term “alpha male” associated with people like Donald Trump and Harvey Weinstein and Bill Clinton and even Bibi Netanyahu. Initially, I just assumed it meant something like a stereotypical masculine type. Well, men will be men. But something caught my eye when I saw a clip about up to 7 male types, starting with Alpha and Beta and going to Zeta. I was curious to see where I fit into this spectrum.

Before I go on, let me explain where this comes from. Apparently, in the animal kingdoms, the males of the species (and their mates) can be categorized into classes. This is primarily seen in social animals like wolves and primates that live in dens or colonies. These packs of creatures always have the leaders that take charge and bully everyone else around. These are known as Alpha. They are like the Rebbas. After that are those who protect and cater to the leaders. These are the Betas or the Gaboyim (or the distinguished Chassidim). After that are the tough enforcers that protect the whole group. These are the Deltas or the Vilde Bucharim. Lastly, we have the wimps that let everyone else kick them around. The ones that eat the shirayim from the Rebbas. These are called Omegas – the regular Chassidim.

This is known as the wolf pack hierarchy.

At some point some folks figured out that we can identify the same classes in human society. And so, people were soon being categorized as Alpha, Beta, Delta, and Omega. But, as humans are much more intelligent and complex, it was noticed that there are those who don’t seem to fit into any of these classes. If we look closely, we note that each of the four classes described has its position or function as part of the pack. They are all team players.

In human society there must be some independents who don’t fit any of these types; those who are “in business for themselves” and don’t take a position on the team. The lone wolves. And so, some additional classes were “invented”. (None of this is truly scientific, but it is certainly indicative).

The Alphas and maybe the Deltas are the super-aggressive ones and the Betas and Omegas are the passive ones. I don’t fit any of those. But as I perused through the descriptions of the classes, the class that defined me the best was the Sigmas. Apparently, we don’t really have these in wolves, but we do in people.

Sigmas are introverted Alphas. They live in their own world, but in that world, they are the leaders. The Sigmas are high achievers but are not looking for limelight. They don’t need validation from other people, no prizes, trophies, fame or fortune. They get what they want without taking it away from others. They avoid open competition or confrontation. They do not let anybody else control them or dictate to them. They are not interested in being a Rebba and do not need or want any chassidim.

In a word, they are passive-aggressive.

As I first read about these attributes and identified with them, my thoughts were that these are the basic attributes of a standard INTJ. So, I tried an experiment. I just Googled up the combination of words “Sigma male” and “INTJ”.

Bingo!

About 141,000 hits including more 10 minute You Tube clips than one could ever watch. At the top of the Google page was a “random” excerpt that read as follows:

Sigma males, also often described as “lone wolves”, tend to be independent, successful and self-reliant. They march to a different drum. Because many INTJs can be described this way, there is likely a strong overlap between the two groups.

I wrote earlier that INTJ Sigmas are introverted Alphas. I would also say that Sigmas are Alphas with a conscience. How so?

Well, let’s get a better picture of Alpha males.

An Alpha male is an achiever driven to success. The problem is that his definition of success is success in the eyes of everybody else. Not necessarily in his own eyes. The Alpha male craves power and recognition and to dominate others because this is what gives him self-worth. He seeks fame and fortune…and women. Lots of them. All at once.

He needs these things, and he will use any means at his disposal to attain them. He is interested in winning and not in playing fair. The fact that he is strong enough to obtain them makes it fair. Might makes right. Thus, if he can and thinks he will get away with it, he will cheat on his studies and on his business clients and on his relationships to get what he wants.

It’s a Nietzsche philosophy of survival of the fittest. Unless they have external ethical constraints, such as being afraid of getting caught and humiliated or of heavenly retribution if they are religious or of local law enforcement, or any other situation where they stand to lose more than they’ll gain, they will persist in their goals.

People of authority, lawyers, prosecutors, judges, and politicians are predominately Alpha. Professional athletes, mercenaries and, of course, violent criminals are almost exclusively Alphas. We won’t say that most Alphas are wicked or narcissistic, but most narcissists and wicked people are Alphas.

Sigmas have a whole different definition of success. To a Sigma, success means being successful in his own eyes. He doesn’t care what anybody else thinks. He is not interested in power, recognition, or fame. He only wants to feel good about himself. He doesn’t use women or fancy cars to show himself off, so he doesn’t need a personal harem of women or a sports car. He doesn’t mind fame and fortune (or women) as long as he knows that he earned it by legitimate efforts.

An INTJ Sigma will not cheat on his tests or his clients or on his relationships. It doesn’t matter if nobody finds out. He will know it and it will make him very, very uncomfortable. Getting things through deceit goes against his standards of achievement. Unlike the Alpha, he will feel like he didn’t really achieve it and it will give him no pleasure because this does not give him his kind of self worth.

Believe it or not, I am not talking about righteousness. Just like I wrote that not all Alphas are wicked, likewise, not all Sigmas are righteous. We play it straight because that is what makes us feel good and worthy, not because it’s the right thing to do.

You can imagine that most heads of state and US presidents will be Alphas. Most of them won’t care if the elections were fair or even if there were no elections at all. They want position and power, and they got it.

In my opinion, the only US presidents in the last 100 years who may be Sigmas are Harry S Truman and Calvin Coolidge and maybe Dwight Eisenhower. Nobody after them (I think Gerald Ford was a Beta). Interestingly, Coolidge, Truman and Ford were not even elected as presidents. They were all selected by their predecessors as Vice Presidents and initially reached the office without elections. Eisenhower, like Trump, was elected president without ever having served in any capacity of politics. I also think that Thomas Jefferson and Abraham Lincoln were Sigmas.

According to the Google sources, Sigma males are a rare breed of men. One source claimed that Alphas comprise about 24% of the general male population, Betas comprise about 26%, the other non-Sigmas collectively take about 47% leaving the Sigmas at about 3%. This makes a lot of sense being that INTJs are also about 3%. But I repeat, this ratio applies to the general population, but I think the numbers are different with us Jews.

One place where we won’t find a lot of Sigma males are in jury boxes. Sigmas are independent critical thinkers. They cannot be brainwashed. This is never good for the prosecution but is even too unpredictable for the defense. The moment a trial lawyer – invariably an Alpha – senses a Sigma, he’ll find a way to disqualify him (or her).

In general, Alphas are not very fond of Sigmas. There is an unspoken rivalry between them. This is because an Alpha needs to be dominant and the Alpha can dominate everyone but the Sigmas. Remember what I wrote that Sigmas cannot be controlled through intimidation or by communal brainwashing. They are the critical thinkers and will challenge any idea that is not logical to them.

וכִרְאוֹת֩ הָמָ֨ן אֶֽת־מׇרְדֳּכַ֜י בְּשַׁ֣עַר הַמֶּ֗לֶךְ וְלֹא־קָם֙ וְלֹא־זָ֣ע מִמֶּ֔נּוּ וַיִּמָּלֵ֥א הָמָ֛ן עַֽל־מׇרְדֳּכַ֖י חֵמָֽה׃

In fact, the Alphas actually feel threatened from Sigmas. It’s not because they fear the Sigma wants to take his imperial crown, the Sigma doesn’t want his crown. It’s because the Sigma will tell the world that the emperor isn’t wearing any clothes.

וְיְסַפֵּ֨ר לָהֶ֥ם הָמָ֛ן אֶת־כְּב֥וֹד עׇשְׁר֖וֹ וְרֹ֣ב בָּנָ֑יו וְאֵת֩ כׇּל־אֲשֶׁ֨ר גִּדְּל֤וֹ הַמֶּ֙לֶךְ֙ וְאֵ֣ת אֲשֶׁ֣ר נִשְּׂא֔וֹ עַל־הַשָּׂרִ֖ים וְעַבְדֵ֥י הַמֶּֽלֶךְ... וְכׇל־זֶ֕ה אֵינֶ֥נּוּ שֹׁוֶ֖ה לִ֑י בְּכׇל־עֵ֗ת אֲשֶׁ֨ר אֲנִ֤י רֹאֶה֙ אֶת־מׇרְדֳּכַ֣י הַיְּהוּדִ֔י יוֹשֵׁ֖ב בְּשַׁ֥עַר הַמֶּֽלֶךְ׃

To be up front, I get a strong feeling that Sigmas make most classes of people nervous and uneasy just by being who we are. They feel that we have something they don’t but can’t figure out what it is. I think the answer is that Sigmas, by definition, have a certain type of self-esteem that the other classes don’t. It is what defines us.

ּ֣כי מׇרְדֳּכַ֣י הַיְּהוּדִ֗י מִשְׁנֶה֙ לַמֶּ֣לֶךְ אֲחַשְׁוֵר֔וֹשׁ וְגָדוֹל֙ לַיְּהוּדִ֔ים וְרָצ֖וּי לְרֹ֣ב אֶחָ֑יו

I call this the stigma of the Sigmas.

As such, if there is one place you will find an abundance of Sigmas, it is in Hollywood. Hollywood is very two-dimensional that it portrays clear good guys (heros) and clear bad guys (villains). The good guys are very often the quiet unassuming underdog who eventually out maneuvers the hapless villain. As such, most of the villains personify Alphas and most of the heroes are Sigmas.

Now I can only relate to movies and television from my earlier years, a generation ago. I don’t know who today’s Hollywood heroes are.

I think the archetypical Sigma of all INTJ Sigmas is Mr. Spock from Star Trek – played by our Jewish Leonard Nimoy. The comic book and movie Batman checks all the Sigma boxes. I think virtually all the Hollywood roles played by Humphrey Bogart, John Wayne, Charlton Heston, Clint Eastwood, Al Pacino, Harrison Ford, and Anthony Hopkins are Sigma roles. Thus, it stands to reason that most of these guys are Sigmas in real life.

Fictitious detectives such as Lt. Columbo – also played by our Jewish Peter Falk, Sherlock Holmes, Charlie Chan and Hercule Poirot are also Sigma personalities. And let’s not forget Kwai Chang Caine - Mr. Kung Fu (David Carradine). Sigma extraordinaire.

So, along with all the other “privileges” I noted above, I think it is a privilege to be an INTJ Sigma. But I don’t want to be selfish. I want to share it. All the above relates to the world at large. But let’s get closer to home. How about us Jews?

As noted already, my personal observation is that we Orthodox Jews spawn a higher concentration of INTJs and Sigmas. Why is this?

Because we are different.

הֶן עָם לְבָדָד יִשְׁכֹּן וּבַגּוֹיִם לֹא יִתְחַשָּׁב

Firstly, let’s refer to my earlier term paper about MBTI. The essence of that paper was to display that most of our esteemed ancestors would fall into the INTJ personality type. This would certainly include Yitzchak Avinu, Yaakov Avinu, Yosef HaTzadik and Moshe Rabbenu. Even though Avraham Avinu and Aharon HaKohen were more of the extroverted type, I still would call them Sigmas. One doesn’t need to be INTJ to be Sigma, just it comes more naturally to INTJs.

I personally believe that there is a hereditary aspect to all of this. We are their descendants. But not this alone. It is nature combined with nurture. We are taught in cheder and Yeshivos to be individualistic and to think for ourselves. This was actually the compliment that Moshe Rabbenu said about us as a nation when he pleaded on our behalf and called us a stiff-necked people.

HKBH wanted us to be a segulah from all the nations (Shmos 19:5), I think He wanted us to be a Sigma from all the nations.

והייתם לי סגלה מכל העמים – אל תקרי סגלה אלא סיגמה (תורת יחזקאל)

Chazal call us one sheep between 70 wolves. I would characterize it a little differently - one Sigma wolf among 70 Alphas.

We are the white wolf of the family.

And there can be no doubt that all of our adversaries were Alphas – Nimrod, Yishmael, Eisav and Amalek, Lavan and Bilaam, Pharaoh, Nebuchadnetzer, Titus – all of them alphas. All of them thought they can dominate us, but it just doesn’t work.

Nothing is clearer than the standoff between Haman and Mordechai. The ultra-Alpha versus the ultra-Sigma. Haman had the yedei Eisav which seems to work against everyone else. But Mordechai had the kol Yaakov. This is something that only we have.

This is the struggle that we are fighting to this very day. Especially in this time of war. The whole Alpha-driven world is trying to dictate to us what to do. How many pundits have I heard claim that “Israel is in trouble because they are losing the sympathy of the world”? They will not admit the truth: Israel never had the sympathy of the world. We didn’t have it any more on Oct. 8 than we have now. It was all just lip service then. We haven’t lost anything. It was never there.

All the western nations are afraid of the Islamists making violent protests. So, the Western nations are telling us to “stop the genocide”. But it’s not genocide, it’s just a vicious war. It's just that since we are winning this war, b’Chasdei HaBorei, it suddenly becomes a “genocide”. And they are trying to force us to stop this false “genocide” using all kinds of vacuous threats and even international courts of "justice".

So, the United States doesn’t want to let us go straight into Rafah and, B’Ezras Hashem, win this war, to make the world a better place for everyone. Yet, they cannot threaten us with holding back military aid. They are afraid to do so because they know that if they cut us off, we will produce our own weapons (or buy them somewhere else) and go it alone. Then they won’t have any more leverage on us whatsoever. They will lose total control.

They are wearing no clothes.

As much as I am not a big chassid of Bibi, and I think he bowed down to Haman far too many times in the past, I think he has finally learned his lesson.

אין לנו על מי לסמוך אלא על אבינו שבשמים.

The only way to defeat Haman or Hamas is לא יכרע ולא ישתחוה.

 

If we stick with this, we can be zocheh to:

 

וּבִשְׁנֵים֩ עָשָׂ֨ר חֹ֜דֶשׁ הוּא־חֹ֣דֶשׁ אֲדָ֗ר בִּשְׁלוֹשָׁ֨ה עָשָׂ֥ר יוֹם֙ בּ֔וֹ אֲשֶׁ֨ר הִגִּ֧יעַ דְּבַר־הַמֶּ֛לֶךְ וְדָת֖וֹ לְהֵעָשׂ֑וֹת בַּיּ֗וֹם אֲשֶׁ֨ר שִׂבְּר֜וּ אֹיְבֵ֤י הַיְּהוּדִים֙ לִשְׁל֣וֹט בָּהֶ֔ם וְנַהֲפ֣וֹךְ ה֔וּא אֲשֶׁ֨ר יִשְׁלְט֧וּ הַיְּהוּדִ֛ים הֵ֖מָּה בְּשֹׂנְאֵיהֶֽם׃

 

And so, on the thirteenth day of the twelfth month—that is, the month of Adar—when the king’s command and decree were to be executed, the very day on which the enemies of the Jews had expected to dominate them, the opposite happened, and the Jews were dominant over their enemies.

נִקְהֲל֨וּ הַיְּהוּדִ֜ים בְּעָרֵיהֶ֗ם בְּכׇל־מְדִינוֹת֙ הַמֶּ֣לֶךְ אֲחַשְׁוֵר֔וֹשׁ לִשְׁלֹ֣חַ יָ֔ד בִּמְבַקְשֵׁ֖י רָֽעָתָ֑ם וְאִישׁ֙ לֹא־עָמַ֣ד לִפְנֵיהֶ֔ם כִּֽי־נָפַ֥ל פַּחְדָּ֖ם עַל־כׇּל־הָעַמִּֽים׃

 

Throughout the provinces of King Ahasuerus, the Jews mustered in their cities to attack those who sought their hurt; and no one could withstand them, for the fear of them had fallen upon all the peoples.

וְכׇל־שָׂרֵ֨י הַמְּדִינ֜וֹת וְהָאֲחַשְׁדַּרְפְּנִ֣ים וְהַפַּח֗וֹת וְעֹשֵׂ֤י הַמְּלָאכָה֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר לַמֶּ֔לֶךְ מְנַשְּׂאִ֖ים אֶת־הַיְּהוּדִ֑ים כִּֽי־נָפַ֥ל פַּֽחַד־מׇרְדֳּכַ֖י עֲלֵיהֶֽם׃

Indeed, all the officials of the provinces—the satraps, the governors, and the king’s stewards—showed deference to the Jews, because the fear of Mordecai had fallen upon them.

 

וּמׇרְדֳּכַ֞י יָצָ֣א ׀ מִלִּפְנֵ֣י הַמֶּ֗לֶךְ בִּלְב֤וּשׁ מַלְכוּת֙ תְּכֵ֣לֶת וָח֔וּר וַעֲטֶ֤רֶת זָהָב֙ גְּדוֹלָ֔ה וְתַכְרִ֥יךְ בּ֖וּץ וְאַרְגָּמָ֑ן וְהָעִ֣יר שׁוּשָׁ֔ן צָהֲלָ֖ה וְשָׂמֵֽחָה׃

Mordecai left the king’s presence in royal robes of blue and white, with a magnificent crown of gold and a mantle of fine linen and purple wool. And the city of Shushan rang with joyous cries.

 

Dovid Hamelech told us:

וענוים יירשו ארץ והתענגו על רב שלום

 

The Sigmas will inherit the earth and delight on the abundance of peace.

 

לַיְּהוּדִ֕ים הָֽיְתָ֥ה אוֹרָ֖ה וְשִׂמְחָ֑ה וְשָׂשֹׂ֖ן וִיקָֽר׃

Service with a Smile? - The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same

 

Ever since the horrific events of Shemini Atzeres there has been a noticeable surge in consciousness concerning our challenging role as the Nation of G-d. Baruch Hashem, more and more people have been swelling up with Jewish pride and a team spirit. There has certainly been a surge in what we call “national unity” and support for our soldiers and even our politicians. We have seen scores of previously secular soldiers and citizens taking on mitzvos of tzitzis, tefillin, krias shema, and observing Shabbos. Numerous generous individuals and grass roots organizations have sprung up to provide goods and services to soldiers, their families, displaced persons, and those who have been traumatized or otherwise affected by the war. And this is with no distinction as to the level of observance or the ethnic circles of the recipients.

מי כעמך ישראל

All this is heartwarming and inspiring and it gives us false optimism about our achievements. We may convince ourselves that all this unity and chessed is pleasing HKBH and we are surely on the threshold of the final geulah.

I have sad news. I don’t think we are even close to making HKBH happy. Certainly He is pleased with all of our unity, tehillim and chessed and it scores valuable points, but it isn’t what He wants from us. He wants soul-searching.

He wants all of us to do our personal soul-searching and righting our wrongs – like the citizens of Nineveh. In some cases, we know what we’ve done wrong and in others we may not know unless we are told. But once we are told by somebody else, then we know. Some things may be easy to fix and others may not be so easy, but at least we need to deal with the easy things.

I don’t see it happening.

Despite this war and the sense of unity it has invoked, when it comes to the friction of day-to-day events between people, it doesn’t look to me like anything has changed.

The latest personal examples:

Case 1

Just this past Friday, about 20 minutes before candle-lighting, I had exited the mikveh and got into my car. A gentleman who I am not acquainted with also exited the mikveh and got into his car which was on the opposite side of the street. He needed to go my direction so he attempted a single motion U-turn. He was just a touch shy of having clearance and, as such, he clipped my front fender.

He glanced into my car and certainly must have seen that I was in it and ready to step out to survey the possible damage. Then he just drove off.

I wasn’t able to get his tag number, though I don’t know what I would have done even if I did. Turns out, it looks like he didn’t do anything more than a paint scrape, but he could have done worse like knock out my headlight. He had a responsibility to hang around and find out and to deal with any significant damage. He ran.

Case 2 

I hired a nice Jewish fella with a large kipa to fix a leak in my roof. I met him as he was doing some work in the neighborhood. We set a price and he asked for about a third up front. This is standard. I put together NIS 1200 in cash. He came and picked up the cash and signed me a receipt.

This is the last I saw of him or my cash. At first, he answered his phone and assured me he is coming right after he finishes something he is working on. Then, he claimed, another urgent job came up, but he’ll be right there. Then, there was some rain, so we need to wait. Finally, he stopped answering calls altogether.

I actually first met him on Parshat Noach and he made a quip of working with tar just like on the teivah. This was two weeks after the horrible Shemini Atzeres when we were all in a sense of ultra-unity and camaraderie. No matter.

Case 3

There is person who comes to my Beis Midrash who is known to be a very learned fellow. Yet, he feels entitled to pull a chair and shtender and park himself smack in the middle of a narrow side aisle near the wall, essentially obstructing the aisle and all that it accesses (shelves with important sefarim). This forces anyone who needs to use this aisle to detour around it or to squeeze by him and ask “permission” to get by. This is during the night sedarim when the Beis Midrash is very sparsely populated. As such, he probably rationalizes that he is not inconveniencing very many people. On the same note, because the Beis Midrash is not so full, there are plenty of vacant normal places to sit.

In any case, I am one of those who get inconvenienced by his obstruction and I don’t see any reason why he is entitled to inconvenience a single soul. Plus, there are Halachos about these things (not in his favor). So I let him know that he is oyut of bounds and has no right to block an aisle and is creating a chillul Hashem.

As is my fate, I get ignored. This has gone on for quite a few months and well after the Shemini Atzeres tragedy. I see it as a public display of hubris and arrogance. One would think that once any person files a complaint, this Talmid Chacham would have the decency to back away. I guess it’s just because he has no respect for me.

Case 4

There is still some fallout regarding the defamation (Internet shaming) episode I endured several years ago. The main article on the JCW website was removed last year, but there is still a defamatory news article that they helped to compose. Shana Aaronson has linked it on the “news” section of her Magen website.

In late October I wrote to Shana Aaronson and informed her why this is a defamatory article and her obligation to remove it. She ignored my letter.

Generally, speaking, the News section of Shana’s website is the biggest cesspool of lashon hara or motzi shem rah – depending on whether she is reporting facts or just allegations – that I have ever seen. It is basically a new reincarnation of JCW’s Wall of Shame and commits the same heap of transgressions that I reported in earlier posts (HERE and HERE). These include that there is no allowance for comments or responses or for anyone to challenge the accuracy of the material, or to make any appeal to take down harmful content. I know this firsthand.

While we are discussing it, the JCW organization has been mostly idle for close to five years and even now, they persist to display their very outdated Wall of Shame with no shame. This is without any updates and subject to all of the problems mentioned years back.

Case 5

In the course of the defamation episode I discovered that a relative of mine supplied damaging information about me to Meyer Seewald and JCW. Once I found out, I attempted to contact her to let her know that she has damages to deal with. She resorted to ghosting and gaslighting but no conciliation. I let it go at first but it’s still an open wound. So in the period after Shemini Atzeres, I made another attempt hoping that the pervading somber mood sobered her up. 

Just more ghosting and gaslighting.

Case 6

On January 31, Dassi Erlich released her poisonous book about the Malka Leifer episode. I explained why it is so poisonous in my previous post. I am almost finished reading it and all the complaints of dishonesty in my previous post stand firm. I hope to give a more elaborate review in the near future, IYH.

Case 7

On a subject that I haven’t really addressed in these pages, but I intend to, I have seen numerous instances over the years, of pious dayanim and Batei Din who, let’s just say, were making mistakes. I am talking about mistakes that didn’t need to happen and that have caused damages to people that also didn’t need to happen.

I am talking about easily avoidable damages and, in some cases, easily fixable damages. Yet, the dayanim involved are not too eager to acknowledge the mistakes, nor to fix or minimize the damage. One shocking instance happened just recently, in this apocalyptic period.

The reason this is significant is because chazal tell us in Pirkei Avos (5:11):

חרב באה לעולם על עוות הדין ועל עינוי הדין ועל המורים בתורה שלא כהלכה.

Sword (i.e., violent death) comes to the world due to corrupting judgement, delaying judgement and issuing rulings that don’t conform with Halacha.

Ever since Shemini Atzeres, we are currently in a situation of cherev – sword – which means war and violent death. According to Chazal, there must be some responsibility from the Batei Din. What’s more shocking is that on November 30, 2024, at the height of the war, there was a tragic terrorist attack at the entrance of Yerushalayim which claimed four precious Jews. One was a very prominent dayan, a second was the niece of a dayan and one of the wounded was likewise a dayan.

This “cherev” does not only come to the tzibur, but it comes to the dayanim themselves.

Case 8

One would expect that during this upheaval, there would be a marked increase in those seeking to make Aliyah and of immigration numbers. I am connected with someone who is connected with Nefesh B’Nefesh. He told me that there is certainly an uptick in interest and Aliyah information being downloaded from their web site. But there does not seem to be any expedited Aliyah nor a significant surge of people looking for an expedited Aliyah. The normal process is a slow one and those who may be interested are taking their time the same as always. The numbers are not close to what we would expect under the circumstances. This is despite all the “writing on the wall” and very distinguished influencers letting us know that this is what HKBH is urging us to do.

 

All of the above are reports from the past five months, but they are the things that have been part of everyday life for time immemorial. I presented this list because I can attest to each one in person. But I am sure, each person has their own list. And what does it all teach us?

That nothing has really changed.

Despite all the hype about how unified we became, how much chessed we are doing and that many religious underachievers are becoming more observant, I don’t think we have really come very far. There is nothing remarkable about this newfound unity. We are all facing the same 70 wolves that want to tear all of us apart so it is natural to band together. We have always been doing remarkable acts of chessed. There is still way too much chillul Shabbos and maachalos asuros and worse. Even the extra Tehillim is slacking off.

We are not close. Certainly not close enough.

At least this show of unity and “tolerance” stood for something. Chazal tell us that the reason the dor haflaga was not wiped out was because they got along with each other – though maybe a bit too well.

But, of late, even this show of unity is crashing down. The Satan cannot leave us alone. The specter of forced chareidi draft has risen from its crypt and reared its ugly head.

When this war broke out, there was a major call-up of reservists and more showed up to play than they even expected. Meanwhile, the regular army was put to work and the scheduled upcoming draftees are standing on deck. Aside from this, there was a noticeable surge of voluntary enlistments which, I believe, included about 2000 members of the chareidi community who came on their own.

Baruch Hashem, at this point in time, there is no lack of manpower in the IDF and those that are in are highly motivated. Most everybody on the outside were and remain very supportive of our soldiers, help provide for them (and their families) and we daven and learn with them in mind.

Despite our painful losses, HKBH blessed us with miraculous achievements and the situation looks positive and stable. It’s not a situation we want to mess with. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

But here comes the erev rav, the anti-Torah lefties are back to their old mischief. It starts at the wretched Bagatz who cannot live with the status quo and needs to have a very untimely and impossible draft law. Then come the secular politicians – Lapid, Liberman, Matan Kahana, Gallant, all the usual suspects, who are haunted by this unity and can’t leave well enough alone. These folks live for one thing - getting their names and mugs into some news headlines. And this is the easiest way to do it.

Now, aside from reigniting the dormant divisiveness that has plagued us for 75 years, there is an additional side effect. Remember my short list of social ills I described earlier in this post? The last on the list was that there does not seem to be a substantial increase in Aliyah.

Aliyah is a good thing and very important for Klal Yisrael. Firstly, it is to our great advantage to populate this country with committed Jews as much as possible. Also to bring in professionals, craftsmen and techies to provide their services and to help us thrive. Lastly, it is the best thing for the diaspora Jews to get out of the hostile self-destructing world.

In short, we need Aliyah. The more observant the Jews, the better. We need the galus chareidi Jews to come as much as anybody else.

Alas, over the past decades, one of the chief impediments to Aliyah among the “Torah-diga” Jews was the requirement to deal with the army. This was mitigated by the initial status-quo agreement and some of the provisional laws from the recent years. But every time this subject comes back to the front burner, it throws a heavy monkey wrench onto the negative side of the pro/con decision scale.

So, aside from destroying our recent unity, it is keeping Jews away from the land.

We have come one step forward and gone two steps back.

So far in my blog, which opened in 2008, I have not devoted many posts to the chareidi draft issue. When I started my One Above and Seven Below project, I assumed it would be one of the hot, front-running topics. But it did not turn out that way. Why?

Because for the past 15 years we have hardly used the army. The brief military campaigns that we had, only required a very limited mobilization. It almost never came up as a real-time issue. In addition, the advent of the Nahal Chareidi Brigage – of which I have two sons who joined – alleviated a lot of the controversy.

On the question of Torah obligations, that the religious Zionist and MO pro-army camp tries to preach, there have been a long list of considerations that they are not prepared to answer honestly:

Q. Can today's government be considered a Jewish national government?

A. They may think so, but the chareidi world thinks otherwise.

Q. What are the qualifications for a King?

A. Either he must be a clear Davidic descendant or the majority of observant Jews need to appoint him. A plurality does not work.

Q. What is a war?

A. A war is a time of active hostilities between Israel and its enemies.

Q. So a standing army doing “soldiering” when there are no hostilities is not called a war, correct?

A. Correct

Q. Is there any Torah obligation whatsoever to be conscripted to a standing army when there are no hostilities going on?

A. None whatsoever.

Q. Who has to show up for a war and who not?

A. In general, any male that is needed except for those in avodas kodesh (Bnei Levi), unless the circumstances are dire.

Q. And what happens when the hostilities end?

A. they are free to go home.

Q. What is the difference between a milchemes mitzvah and a milchemes rishus?

A. In a milchemes rishus, anyone who really doesn’t want to fight, doesn’t have to but they may need to be jobniks. In a milchemes mitzvah, anybody who is needed needs to show up. But they need to be needed. When the Mishna in Sotah says that even a chassan and kallah must show up, this is obviously subject to common sense. It certainly does not mean that the first thing we do is collect all the chassanim and kallos and send them to the front lines. First, we call up the regular milchemes rishus type of soldiers. If we still need more, we can begin to call up those who may otherwise be exempt.

Q. What is the Halachic age for army service? (This is a tough one that will surprise many).

A. There is no Halachic age mentioned anywhere in Talmud Bavli, Yerushalmi, Midrash, Rambam or anywhere. Rashi notwithstanding, the 20-year mark mentioned in the Torah is inconclusive and may only be applicable to kibush Haaretz since only men 20 years on up would be getting a portion. Still, it’s not worse than an “asmachta”. As such, nobody less than 20 should be called up unless they are specifically needed or they volunteer.

Q. What are the responsibilities of the "avodas hakodesh" class in this regard?

A. Those who are designated for Temple service and for teaching Torah are not supposed to engage in war. This automatically applies to the Bnei Levi (Rambam Shmitta and Yovel 13:12).

Q. Can one be part of the "avodas hakodesh" class even if he is not from Shevet Levy?

A. Any human who so designates himself has this privilege (Rambam Ibid 13:13).

Q. What are the Halachic standards that a Jewish army must live up to?

A. No girls, no gays, no promiscuity, no kol isha events, best kashrus obtainable, complete observance of mitzvos and shabbos when hostilities are not in effect and set times for Torah study.

What emerges from all this is that, as long as there is no essential war going on, there is no Halachic basis to support any forced conscription. If the army does not maintain the standards of modesty and observance, it is actually forbidden to join it and certainly to force an observant Jewish person to enlist.

In times of war, an observant person may be drafted if:

·         The army maintains the rules of modesty (no girls, gays, etc.)

·         He is needed

·         He is released when the active hostilities are no longer if effect

This does not apply to Yeshiva students unless all other available candidates have already been drafted and more manpower is still needed. This is a very unlikely, and frightening, scenario.

If this is the basis of a draft law and is not violated, we will be able to maintain our national teamwork and even thrive. וכל העם הזה על מקומו יבא בשלום.

Such a law would not be too difficult to write up. The way to do it is to loosen draft requirements across the board, including the secular, so that it can apply to everyone. This means to invoke a more generous list of situations which are subject to deferrals possibly including those who want to study in university under certain conditions. With today’s demographics, I believe enough people will opt in that there won’t be recruitment shortages.

But one thing is for sure. If the Charedi draft issue reverts to the same left-right anti-Yeshiva political power play like it has been since the days of Ben Gurion, we will stay where we’ve been for the past 75 years.

Albert Einstein was offered the position of President of Israel after Chaim Weitzman passed away in 1952. He turned it down and it’s a shame. Perhaps, if he would have become Israel’s president, he could have taught this country, as well as people such as Lapid, Liberman, Gallant and Kahana, a valuable lesson:

Anyone who keeps repeating the same actions over and over again and expects different results meets the definition of insanity.